{THIS MORNING...}

This morning was kind of like every other morning.

The big lil' rises first.

Wakes up daddy. Wakes up mommy. Insist on waking up brother.

The norm. 

I try to ease myself out of bed. No real excitment for the day. This morning, just like every other morning. At home. With my boys. 

Washing faces. Brushing teeth. Dressed. Chores. Down the stairs and ready for breakfast.  

Oatmeal. Cheerios. Daddy says goodbye and he's out the door.  

We read. We sing songs. We play with train tracks as I count down the hours until nap time even though they just woke up. 

I've purposed to take pictures EVERYDAY no matter what. So I snap a few here, and get a few there. 

I watch as he pretends to read from the pages of a beautiful book. Far from tuned in and still counting down until my next "break". 

 

We stop to color and have a little snack. 

And then back to reading again. 

 

Finally, nap time rolled around. I quickly changed them, started their favorite flicks and put them down. I plopped myself down on the couch and thanked God for getting me through the morning. I flipped through a few channels and tip-toed upstairs to grab something really quickly. I peeked into the big lil's room for a sec and found this...

Apparently, he did a little reading before he decided to make himself comfortable in his tent and get a little rest in for the day. 

I inched myself back and sat in the chair directly across from my precious baby boy and I cried. I cried at the thought of how ungrateful I had been.

I had taken for granted everything that was so beautiful about this morning. Everything that I had spent so much time wishing would go by quickly. Trying to speed through from morning to nap time and then nap time to bed time.

What had I done? How ungrateful had I become?

This morning...

there was so much beauty right before my eyes. My beautiful, healthy, vibrant, joyous boys. My amazing, loving, devoted, Godly husband... I could go on. 

This morning...

I made one good decision. And, as I downloaded the images from the day, that I forced myself to take, I was able to replay and re-live a morning that should have been filled with gratefulness and joy. 

It is so easy to focus on all of the things that you DON'T have or DON'T get to do. So easy to focus on the people that get to go out and the couples before kids that get to travel and do things on a whim. 

If you're not careful, it's so easy to become so ungrateful in a situation where gratefulness should abound you. 

So, this is me...reminding myself of that very thing...

This morning.

XoXo,

Syreena 

{THOUGHTS ON SOCIAL MEDIA, WHITNEY HOUSTON & A MEASURE OF GRACE...}

If you knew anything about me you would know that I'm a pretty private person. Which is pretty funny considering this little blog of mine. It's seriously out of character for me. But I think I've pretty much programmed my brain to think that when I write and hit publish my words fly off somewhere into space. It's only when I hear from a friend, and even not a friend, about details of my life and think to myself...

who he heck told you that's...that's personal information. Violation!!!

Then I remember that this little blog of mine is really being read by more than just the tiny green and white Martians on Mars. I've gotten somewhat comfortable with being a "blogger" but the social media part still makes me hesitate. How much do I really want other people to know? What is really necessary to tweet or worthy of a Facebook update?? I don't normally comment on celebrity happenings and major "issues" but I just couldn't help but share my thoughts.

I got back just in time from my night out with the husband to watch Whitney Houston's Homegoing service. Which was nothing short of sad and beautiful all at the same time. I was also privy to the social media play by play as people tweeted and commented on Facebook throughout the entire service. There were so many things about the service that I loved more than I wish to share. But there were two parts that stood out so clearly to me. The first being the genuine words spoken by her "real life" bodyguard mentioning how she gave herself to the world and heartwarmingly pleading for the world to have a little grace with others that do the same. Seriously guy... I could have cried right then!!!!

sidenote: so in love with how goWageous she is in this picture...

{source} 

The second thing that touched me so was the story that Be Be Winans shared about how she selflessly gave of herself and in the height of her career didn't think twice about singing back up for them when they needed a little help. I found this clip (gotta love YouTube) and it touched my heart just to watch and witness the beauty of who she truly was.

I've been thinking about social media and the media in general a lot lately. I have a very interesting love hate relationship with social media that I care not to seriously expand upon however I will briefly explain. In so many ways social media is nothing short of amazing, the ability to connect, share and reach out has never before been so tangible as today but on the down side it also gives the idiots, uninformed and uncompassionate a platform and that just plain sucks. Her ability to set all pride aside and ACT from her heart speaks volumes to the kind of person she really was. We make mistakes. People make mistakes. Life is not easy and darkness is all around you. But grace carries us through and the quick to judge attitude that so many of us adopt today is seriously disheartening.

Seriously!

I struggle, at times, with this blog of mine, with the nature of blogging and opening yourself up to the public in general. It's scary. You are opening yourself up to, not only the good, but the jokes, critics and critisism as well. It's scary. But despite the fact that I am a pretty private person at heart, I do it because of the many people who have told me that my words help them. I do it for the people who write me and call me to tell me that they look forward to my post and that they tried something new because I did or that they thought of something differently because they saw that I challenged myself to think and do differently too.

There is so much beauty in sharing who you are with others. I am constantly encouraged and uplifted by others who choose to share their stories and experiences and I can only hope that I can do the same for someone else. When people share with you in any capacity, weather it be the beauty of someone's voice and music or the openness of someone's personal dreams, hopes or feelings don't be so quick to judge, criticize, critic, tear down etc. watching this video really touched me...

...too much not to share.

XoXo,

Syreena

{AWAY W/ MY BOO...}

A-M-A-Z-I-N-G sums up my day today! I'm still sitting here trying to figure out why in the world we hadn't done this sooner. 

Oh yeah, it was because of my silly self who (for some reason) convinced herself that her kids couldn't survive without her. That they would somehow become Russian spies if I'm not around every second of the day to guide them through this cold, cold world that we live in.

Ummmm... yeah, NO! 

If you are a new mommy...please don't do this to yourself. 

You NEED time away, you NEED a break...

I felt like a married woman for the first time in three years. Not just a woman, with kids...and a baby's daddy who just happens to be my husband. There's a difference. Trust me!

Instagram when I just didn't feel like reaching for the camera...

We kept it simple... kept it quite.

Went to a few stores (without two whiny babies :), candy run to Five Below and camped it in the room for the night ;)

MUST.DO.THIS.AGAIN.SOON!!!

Please tell me that I am the only one that takes this long to get away with their husband after having babies. Do you go away often? For some reason I feel like the one nighters are the best. Sadly and cutely enough we were both super excited to get home to our babies. Those dang boys are our world :)

XoXo,

Syreena

{A NIGHT OUT...}

Going out with the husband for the night for the first time since the lil's were born!!! Thought this night would never come :) I have to be the only weirdo that took this long before she left her babies over night with someone else. It's been THREE YEARS, ReallY???!!???

XoXo,

Syreena

{HOW I DEAL WHEN MY BABIES ARE SICK...}

Having a sick baby is certainly número UNO on my list of things I never wanna experience in my life! I hate it. Everything in me just wants to take all of the pain away and I can't. When my big lil was in the PICU for a couple weeks I really learned how to turn to God for comfort and grasp a better handle on the mess that I was when my babies are sick. After bringing him home form the hospital my anxiety got even worse and it became extremely difficult for me to deal when my babies had any type of health issue from a normal cold to eczema and even watery eyes and runny noses. I was a MESS!!!!

Through the months I have learned that there are certain things that I must do in order to control the stress ball that I become when my boys are not feeling 100%. And yes, it is that serious. I know that it is God's will for his children to be in perfect health even when it comes down to the "common" cold. And, oftentimes I find myself frustrated and sometimes even angry with God (never the way to go, to be angry with God...Lord forgive me :)) when my babies get sick. What I know now, for sure, is that sickness is no part of God. That he doesn't bring it or allow it but what he does do is take it away (if I only believe). What I have also realized is that growing my faith in a certain area and seeing its manifestation in my life are a process. And on that journey to divine health for myself AND my children these are the things I do to cope... to deal... in the meantime...

.Get friendly with the professionals- I adore my doctor and ALL of his staff!!! The secret is that my doctor isn't even a pediatrician!!! I KNOW!!!! Well not really :/ I've had my same doctor since the husband and I married six years ago and when my lil's came along it was only natural that he manage their care just as he has been for the husband and I. I got a lot of slack from other people for not finding a "Pediatrician" but here's the thing... He listens, he cares, he doesn't pretend to know everything, he doesn't rush me out of his office to get to the next patient of the day! We are super close and comfy with the secretaries and one of them the lil's call Grandma Patty (doesn't get much better than that). I even keep in good touch with the Attending Physician that cared for the big lil' during his stay at the PICU. A text message here and there to reminding him of how grateful I am for the quality of care that he showed my baby and my family. These connections have been my saving grace! I have no problems calling my doctors answering service after hours nor any hesitations to bust out a quick text when something just doesn't seem right and I need some advice. These relationships are SO important! Don't be afraid to make sure your doctors know your name and remember exactly who you are even if you were their ba-zillionth patient of the day.

.Don't doubt my mommy instincts- I doubted my mommy instincts once before and I will NEVER DO IT AGAIN!!! I AM my baby's voice and if I don't speak up for them no one else will. If something doesn't seem right....it's not! That's all.

.Nip it in the bud- I don't wait for gi-normous red flags to start waving before I start doing something about it. If my lil's are slowing down, looking a tad strange, moving a bit funny, eyes a bit glassy I get on it. Tylenol is my friend. Cool mist humidifiers, even better. I don't wait until they are full fledged out of commission before I pick up the phone for a quick doctor's visit or a small dose of pain reliever. I also try a lot more preventative things now. Daily multi vitamins, smoothies full of antioxidant packed fruits and nutrient filled veggies, and a regular cleaning of thier billions of toys.

.Trust and Agree- Some times I just can't! Sometimes I just have too much on my plate to take on the "worry" of having a baby that is not feeling so good. I just can't stay up all night making sure his breathing sounds normal, checking his skin for any signs of reaction, counting the minutes until his next dose of medicine, I just can't. So no matter how much I feel like no one can take care of my babies better than I can, the fact is that that's just not true. Times like these I have to trust that the husband can take over and agree that he can decide what's best. This is when I leave all of my worries at the door and rest. I just let thier daddy be the nurse for the day :)

.A little comfort goes a long way- There is nothing quite like a mommy or daddy snuggled up next to you with your favorite blanket and plush animal when you are feeling a little blue. Sick time is snuggle time for sure. 

How do you deal when your babies are sick??

XoXo,

Syreena